In The Morning

i like songs with heavy breathing!!!

okay conclusions my paranoid self has come to recently:
1. i like lists alot
2. i am by far gayer than gabby with my screennames: GrLPwR3EvA, asianaudrey91 [my sister called me an asian audrey hepburn when i was like 7 -_- idk why], ricaica55 [weird creepy nickname that i sort of liked but didn't.. long story], LiPgLoSsnFloss [i thought i was G], ShIaT itZjEsSicA [i totally copied some girl], chutupitsjessica, jessicaXcouture [not that bad, i guess. at least i can say i didn't make it up TEE HEE]
3. im convinced that i am getting more and more boring by that day... or shall i say "ordinary" or "generic"... and then thinking about "ordinary" just makes me think of American Beauty (yes, bombass movie) and how they're like "being ordinary is the worst thing..." or something and i totally believe that. but then there's the whole catch 22 thing where trying to be extraordinary makes you even more ordinary. so does trying to be ordinary make you extraordinary? i don't know, something ridiculous like that.
4. i think about myself too much (everything above starts with an "i"... :[) and i completely overanalyze everything
5. i can't wait to grow up (i know, that sounds weird) but in all honesty i'm not enjoying high school very much since it mostly consists of my STUDYING but i can't really complain because i go out more than other IB kids. but is till just dont understand the whole point of killing yourself at the expense of happiness... well i sort of do. to be happy later. but what if i'm not? i dunno, i sort of want to fast forward and get to the part where i no longer have to be so bored all the time (most of the time). i dunno i'm sort of exaggeratting. but i guess i still have some fun so it's okay
6. even though i thought i was lame then, i'm still lame now. :|
7. i really REALLY don't like some of these IB kids because they fulfill the stereotype of being condescending towards others :|
8. i'm very similar to my grandmother and father... in sort of bad ways (aka i'm sort of evil conniving and shrewd...just kidding... not really.. sort of)
9. gabby needs to stop talking to me so i can stop procrastinating
10. Webbies see me as "the asian girl who was really good at raving" and "used to go to all the dances" -__- my friend explained to someone that i no longer go to webb dances because i "no longer leave the house" because i study all the time.
11. blogspot is ridiculously distracting..
12. i need to stop adding to this list
13. i am ASEXUAL. just kidding me but label me as that in regards to my temporary disinterest towards relationships in general. don't exactly know what i just said but it sounded good. peachy says that "i seem independent" HEY i'm cool wis dat!